I can’t tell you how little I care about sports.

I couldn’t care less that it’s football season, and that’s kind of scandalous if you know anything about me. I really should care about football—I’m from a football-crazed family. And I really should care about Alabama football—I went to UA as an undergrad and played a pretty big role in the team spirit department.

But the thing is, I was always more interested in watching the half-time show and never gave a rip about what came before or after it. And despite the fact that everyone who knows me knows that I don’t care, I still hear the question “What did you think of the game?” and I never know what to say.

What’s the point, you ask. The point is that I just signed up for ESPN’s sports alerts. Why? Because now I can find out who won without actually watching any football at all. (more…)